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Aimee Byrd

Aimee Byrd Ordained By Gay Affirming “Church” to Perform Wedding

The elevation of women in Christian spaces leads to liberalism, particularly in areas of teaching, theology, or writing. One of many such examples is Aimee Byrd, a feminist who arose out of the Orthodox Presbyterian Church. It was P&R Publishing, which stands for Presbyterian & Reformed, that published her first book Housewife Theologian in 2013. She received prominence when she was a contributor to the Mortification of Sin podcast which was hosted by Carl Trueman and Todd Pruitt. Following the release of her book Recovering from Biblical Manhood and Womanhood, she was removed from the podcast, but her brand was already established.

In the fashion with any bad teacher, they get worse with time, Aimee Byrd just reached a new low: performing a wedding. In a recent Substack article entitled, “By the Power Vested in Me,” Byrd details how she performed the marriage ceremony for her brother.

Last weekend I got to experience something that resonated so deeply with my soul. It felt like I got to meet a part of who I am. And in this, I wasn’t only seeing beauty, but participating in the beautiful. I was in my zone, in alignment with my values, and was able to actually be gift and to offer others as gift to one another. And yet, I’m hesitant to write about this, because it is so deeply meaningful to me. I don’t want to cheapen it by the judgment of others. But how do you not share something so fabulous?

The article opens with her describing the delight she felt, yet she knew the backlash it would produce if discovered. She emphasizes that performing this ceremony aligned with her values, not that of Scripture.

My 24-year-old brother married his high school sweetheart on Friday. I watched them grow up together. Many of us who attended the wedding were witnesses to the growth of their love. They haven’t settled into a church yet but have expressed that they want to take their time in finding one now that they are out of college and settling into this new stage of life. He was attending a church at college, but the last one he was a member of was the same one as me, where all the abuse unfolded. My brother came to me saying that he didn’t want to rush into finding a church just for the purpose of having an officiant. And yet, even as their wedding coordinator had a list of options for them, he “didn’t want some random cowboy to marry them.” He and his fiancé wanted to incorporate their faith into the ceremony, and maybe you sense where this is going.

For the record, Aimee Byrd never suffered from church abuse and her experience was merely a combination of backlash to her behavior or people rightfully judging women as unqualified for ministry. Her book received much backlash at the time, and deservedly so, but she calls this abuse. In her own writing, she left the OPC because they would let her “contribute theologically,” which women are not to be theologians either. Nevertheless, “church abuse” is listed as the reason for her brother’s rejection of the church, presumably New Hope OPC in Frederick, MD, and the void of an elder in his life, something she does not rectify by finding him a good church, but rather inserting herself into the problem.

They wanted me to do it, to officiate their wedding. My dad gave me a bit of a heads up that this was their desire. When I first heard it, I thought it absurd. Maybe, anyway. I mean, I’m no pastor or civil official, and I don’t want to pretend to be one. I have a high regard for the pastorate. But this is my brother asking me, and if I say no, I want it to be for good reason.

Now, marriage is not a sacrament, so while it is not an ordinance instituted for the Church, it was nonetheless instituted by God. Furthermore, the vows, even if made before a civil judge, are vows made before God, per the Third Commandment (Matthew 5:34). Byrd proceeds to give a historical outline regarding the customs of weddings, that they were originally separate from the Church until Rome made it a sacrament. While this historically makes sense within the understanding of weddings being tied to the Family Sphere, there are still modern customs associated with marriage that were abided by throughout the ages, which became the next obstacle for Byrd. Naturally, a marriage involves all spheres of authority.

But here is the rub. I’m not a civil authority. And in the state of Maryland, you need either a civil authority or an ordained minister to marry you. Which leads me to the next rabbit hole. Ordination. Am I really going to get ordained online by some universalist church? I know the education and work many pastors go through to get ordained. I respect that. But I’ve also learned that often, it has nothing to do with Christian character and maturity—put in the time, make sure the checks cash, and answer your exam questions on doctrine according to your denominational leaders’ liking. Bada-bing, bada-boom. I’ve seen—I’ve been a product of—the extreme damage done by the weight of this office when it abuses and enables abuse. And on the other end, I’ve been in churches where there are far less educational and doctrinal requirements for ordination. Even before the internet “churches” revealed it to us, requirements for ordination varied widely. What does it even mean?

She respects the work pastors put in, until she disagrees with it, and decides to mock it by going her own way. She proceeds to give a bad early church history lesson on ordination, arguing that the “assigning authority and status” (Latin: ordinatio) is a social construct, not inherently rooted in Scripture.

By the 3rd century we have a detailed description of an ordination ceremony for bishops, elders, and deacons. Not long after, the ordained were considered marked by God to confer the holy sacraments, conveying salvific grace. By the 5th century, ordination transitions from a rite that is associated with a task or ministry, to becoming attached to the person. It’s not lost on me that women were being pushed out of the ministry by this sacramental, hierarchical ecclesiology as well.

Her argument that ordination arose over time is incongruous with Scripture in which Paul, through his epistles to Timothy and Titus, clearly illustrates the formality of eldership in the Church through stringent qualifications. Naturally, as the Apostles were martyred, they required successors. Arguably written before 70 AD, First Clement was addressed in response to Corinth’s sedition against its elders, in which Clement wrote that the Apostles “appointed the first fruits, having first proved them by the Spirit, to be bishops and deacons of those who should afterwards believe.” Ordination is biblical, coming directly from the Apostles who raised up elders over local congregations, thereby establishing the ranks (ordo) of presbyters and deacons. Byrd is intentionally obtuse to suggest that formal ordination arose out of tradition when it is clearly rooted in Scripture. She then rebels against Church history to suggest that “ordination” was used to kick women out of ministry.

I’m over-simplifying this long history, but my point here is that ordination itself is not a “biblical” word and is a cultural construction of its own. I’m not saying that it cannot be adapted well by the church, but it is adapted nonetheless and has a lot of harmful hierarchical baggage. It can mean one thing in the Roman Catholic Church, hold different meaning and qualification even within Protestant denominations, and mean something else in how the state of Maryland recognizes it for the ministry of officiating a wedding. The state of Maryland doesn’t qualify what makes one ordained, or what kind of person is ordained, but recognizes ordination in the ministry as a status for the task of legally officiating a wedding. This made me more inclined to say yes when my brother asked me to officiate his wedding. And as I did some research, I found the American Marriage Ministries that exists for this very purpose. I was comfortable to be appointed for this specific and beautiful ministry.

After over-simplifying history and coming to the incorrect conclusion, she then rationalizes her way into going through a rubber-stamp ordination process to be compliant with Maryland law. The American Marriage Ministries is a progressive “church” where one can become “ordained” by filling out a one-page form and clicking a button. They are pro-homo and even celebrate sologamy (the term for self-marriage being used). These people are a mockery of God while calling themselves a church, per their 501c3 status with the IRS. That Aimee Byrd went to them to “ordain” herself is wicked, but wholly unsurprising since homosexual affirmation follows female ordination.

This is what their website states under their FAQ:

Becoming a minister with the AMM does not require you to hold any particular spiritual belief. We only ask that you agree to our organization’s three tenets, which are listed on our ordination application.

The first tenet is “All people, regardless of race, gender, or sexual orientation, have the right to marry.” Basically, one must agree to support gay “marriage.” This is where she went to become ordained as a minister within their church.

She concludes by disclaiming that she is not usurping the role of pastors to be a wedding officiator.

Do I believe that a pastor is a special calling and gifting by the Spirit? Yes. I’m not in any way wanting to belittle this important vocation. But I also believe in every member ministry. And I now believe that officiating a wedding is an honorable way to participate in that. Some people whom I love in my inner circle disagree. I had to think about that in answering my brother’s request. And in the back of my mind, I knew that the internet would eventually find out. What fuel this is for those who think I have some “liberal agenda.” I am not trying to make trouble. But I have nothing to hide. I also know some of my faithful readers will be disappointed. I decided to be okay with that. I did it for my brother and sister-in-law because they asked me and it truly was an honor. And, I have to say, ranks up there with the most real, Spirit-filled experiences of my life.

In the end, she claims she was doing “ministry” when she went to a homosexual-affirming “church” that rubber-stamped ordinations in under a minute. To her, this was a “Spirit-filled” experience. But it is totally not part of some “liberal agenda” that she got ordained by a gay-affirming “church” that asks its “ordained ministers” to affirm sodomy. She might not have violated Maryland Law, which arose out of good tradition, but she did subvert the spirit of the law.

Aimee Byrd made a career advocating feminism in the Church, but she only became a thing because weak, effeminate men like Carl Trueman and Todd Pruitt promoted her while P&R Publishing and Zondervan published her books. Now Byrd is openly mocking God by ordaining herself through a gay church to perform wedding ceremonies. Her rebellion might feel good at the moment, but the harvest to come shall be wicked.

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2 Responses

  1. Truman and Pruit, “weak effeminate men”. There’s no doubt about your subjective bias.

  2. “…she left the OPC because they would let her ‘contribute theologically’,…”

    I believe you may have meant “…because they would NOT let her ‘contribute theologically’…”

    –Kirby

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